Star Ballz
As the title indicates, Star Ballz could be generically contextualized as a comic crossover between Star Wars and Dragon Ball Z but if you're looking for a light-hearted parody in the manner of Mel Brooks' Spaceballs (1987) or the recent Star Wars XXX (2012), you may be baffled. I personally liked it, perhaps due to the fact that I'm a fan of neither series, at utmost a neutral admirer of the Freudian murkiness that distinguished The Empire Strikes Back and the entertaining artistry of The Return of the Jedi. The prequel trilogy bored me to death. Likewise I'm not an aficionado of anime and manga, which didn't prevent me from enjoying the reviewed production. Althought packaged as a low-budget hentai spoof, Star Ballz uses its form to provide a clever and merciless bastardization of some of the most iconic imagery of the American film industry in the last decade of the XXth century. It fuses obscenity and references to cult flicks[1] in the most bizarre and humoristic manner. The prefatory overscreen commentaries from Beavis and Butthead prognosticate the viewer's entrance into the world of moronic voyeristic experience, but the joke is on the ataractic consumer of pop porn and franchise blockbusters like Star Wars. The plot begins with the busty Princess (Leia stylized as Sailor Moon) and her magical girls battling penis-headed Sperm Troopers led by D Villy (Darth Vader with Mickey Mouse ears and a red bowtie). As in the original version, Leia is captured but her anal transmission with plea for rescue is caught by "Wank" Solo (Dragon Ball Z's Goku) and his companion Chihuahua [2](hairy Howard Stern look-alike). The duo journeys to a Transformer-like space ship to lock laser swords in the final battle against the dark side of the Cum Force, on the way encountering cameos from pop culture personae who engage in the most delirious rule-34 sexual scenarios (cue Jar Jar Binks sodomized by xenomorph's alien-tongue) [3]. The film features, among others, a very gay version of C3PO as Pikachu, Ewoks as Internet anti-piracy squad, or Mulder and Scully in an absurdly anti-climactic episode of sex files.
It's easy to miss the ingenuity with which the creators filled the fatuous 45-minute story with over 20 innuendos to events, characters and citations that shaped the collective American imagination at the turn of the century. In one scene Bill Clinton receives a blowjob from Monica Levinsky who simultaneously hums Star Spangled Banner; in another George Lucas has oral sex performed by the supposedly kid-appealing Jar Jar Binks. It's sheer mindfuckery that's also reporting the status of contemporary American artistic and political scene.
Recommended for all cine buffs, those looking for a satirical angle, weird humor or a good postmodern porn parody (not to confuse with anything that has "A Porn Parody" in its title.)
[1] Direct references to/quatations from include: Trainspotting, Aliens, Silence of the Lambs, Die Hard, The Shining , Matrix, Saving Private Ryan, Good Fellas, Conan the Barbarian, the Abyss, Mission Impossible, Reservoir Dogs, the Planet of the Apes, Seven, Forrest Gump, The X-Files, Meet the Parents, From Dusk Till Dawn, Wayne's World, Blue Velvet, The Sixth Sense, Basic Instinct, X-Men
[2] Also, a reference to the Eurodance trash hit by DJ Bobo?
[3] I presume that's how Star Wars fans must have felt after the screenings of The Phantom Menace.
Best quotes:
Quote from X-Men inserted into Princess's reaction to Sperm Troopers's impressive erections: [Princess/Rogue:] When they come out... does it hurt? [Wolverine/Sperm Troopers: ]Every time.
Princess: I'm gonna tell you three things. If I'm right you walk forward, if I'm wrong you walk back and let me go. Gaga should die right after the opening credits of episode two. Girls really lie when they say size doesn't matter. Everyone thinks it's about time I got fucked.
Princess: Let your empire strike my back.
R2D2: Do you mind if I download some MP3 from you? Do you got some metallic cunt?
Ewoks: Everybody stealing MP3s should die and suffer ... and suffer more.
Mulder (to Scully): Listen, I don't know what we're doing here, so why don't you show some tits?
Danny Torrance: Red bum, redbum, redbum.
Best sex scene(s): the Princess gangbanging Sperm Troopers
